10.23.2013

What To Do with a Bad Haircut

A lesson I've yet to learn when it comes to my hair is simply: DON'T DO IT! Invaluable advice that applies itself to every last one of my hair (mis)adventures. The high (low) point happening in 2009, when I found out about salonapprentice.com, a craigslist-y kind of website which connects people and soon-to-be-stylists in nine cities. Here's a blurb from their website:
Why do we exist? Because salons in metropolitan areas needed a better way to find models for training salon apprentices. Our free website provides an effective way for apprentices to find models. Many salons will offer a free or discounted service for volunteer models. Tell a friend!
So here I am, telling you—all of my friends—DON'T DO IT! And if you must, proceed with caution because this could happen to you *cue spooky music*:


I have straight up been recovering from that cut for FOUR years. I'm not even being dramatic. Who knew "creative cut" meant an entire half of my head's hair would be an inch from my scalp? Not me! That haircut wasn't my first experience with the website either, the blonde highlights in the before/after photos were the result of an appointment for "all over blonde" gone awry. I even got a couple of trims while the asymmetrical disaster grew out after developing a strong case of what else could go wrong??! Eventually I swore I'd never go to a salon again and I didn't until my last complaint-filled hair post in 2011.

The thing is, when I do my hair myself I'm generally alright with the results. Leaving it in someone else's hands is what causes inevitable heartbreak for me. The already terrifying possibility of a professional ignoring your requests is only further amplified (by a million billion) when a student takes the reins. Yet somehow the magic of time made me forget. Andrew says it's exactly like Little Caesars and that could not be more accurate.

All of this to say I found myself back on that damn website last week! I scheduled an appointment with a girl for red violet ombré and a trim. You can't really get a solid idea of my length from any of my posts because it's usually cropped out or in a bun, but I snapped a photo while in the chair before anything happened.

pre-new hair

And now...

Bad Haircut Close-up of un-dyed hair

I don't even mind the brown patches from the poor dye job, or that it's not actually ombré (that's a lie, I TOTALLY MIND). It's my missing length that really has me down. Again. Five-to-six inches is five-to-six inches! I tweeted through my emotions and now I just wish I would have left well enough alone.

Bad Haircut

Do you have any similar hair stories (nightmares) to share? How'd you make it through the pain?? At least it's hair and it'll grow back, right? Ugh! LESSON LEARNED.

16 comments:

  1. One time I asked for a tapered bob. They shaved the back of my head and gave me a bowl cut.

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    1. OMG, WHAT?! I would have flipped out! You poor thing... You seem to be way more daring with your cuts though, so I'm sure you pulled it off.

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  2. Dude. Went to the WalMart in my small college town for a haircut. I know. What was I thinking? I was new to the town and had never had a salon/stylist I liked before. I had the same thought: what's the worst that can happen? Stupid. Stupid. Stupid!
    What happened is that when the hair around my face had a 4 inch difference in length from one side to the other, I threatened to hit the girl who had recently graduated from our local tech school if she touched me or my hair again. I asked for a sort of Kate Goslin bob (pre-Kate Goslin).
    Yeah. I cried to my friends until someone's mother got involved and took me to her local stylist. It took 2 years to fix. I think it was the first time I'd ever cried over a haircut. I'm pretty chill about my hair. I'm live and let live mostly. But not that day. I was eye for an eye that day man. *shudder* Even the memory gets to me.

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    1. Noooooo! Not Walmart!! Ugh, what a nightmare but I love that you were ready to duke it out haha. I hate how emotionally attached I can become to my hair, but that's just how it is sometimes, ya know? I'm sorry that happened to you but you made it! Look at you now haha!

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  3. Every couple of years I get this bug to get my hair permed because I feel like curly hair will be SO much easier to manage because it'll look messy, but okay. A year and a half ago I went to the AVEDA school to get my hair permed and the student screwed it up so bad it felt like straw and it wasn't even curly. I ended up cutting off about 12 inches of my hair. So much hair just gone. Another bad haircut was in college. I wanted shorter hair and for some reason I ended up looking like a q-tip, but then she left my hair about 3 inches long along the bottom in the back. The weirdest hair cut ever. It took forever to grow it back out because when I'd get it trimmed the idiots who cut my hair could never get the sides even. I've gotten to the point where I only get my hair trimmed once a year now and my philosophy is it's just hair...it'll grow back. No more drastic styles for me right now though. lol

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    1. Those students, man... They have the potential to truly ruin lives! 12" is so serious, I just got emotion for you. It's especially tough when leeway is taken after you're specific. I told the girl I only wanted to take care of my split ends when I explained "trim". I guess I should have said no more than 2" or something because there's no way my splits were 6" up! I'm definitely at the never fucking again stage. Now we know better, right?

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  4. A bad haircut is why I shaved my head! I had a good run with a great hairdresser but he quit the business. He gave me a pretty cute short hairstyle, and I told the hairdresser that I wanted it tidied up but a bit shorter at the back so it didn't grow into a mullet. She gave me a short back an sides.

    The worst thing is that I paid SEVENTY DOLLARS for this terrible cut, which made me think "I can give myself an average haircut for free!" and shaved it all off.

    My hair has grown out to about my shoulders now and is getting to an annoying stage so I'm going to have to take the plunge and try another salon. Eep.

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    1. Ugh, that money! At least the shitty experiences I've had came with discounts, so I walked away angry but with "you get what you pay for!" lingering in the back of my mind. You're ballsy though, I love that you shaved your head. I know I'm not brave enough. Just look at how upset I am just over this!

      Good luck finding a new place, and stay away from students!!

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  5. I'm very fortunate that my best friend is a professional stylist, so she does my hair. We have agreements though, she wont cut off more than four inches. If I want anything drastic I have to go to someone else.

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    1. Oh, how lucky! I wish I could strike up that kind of arrangement but I have no friends in the industry. When I was in college I was way more experimental and used to DIY everything. I may resort to cutting my own hair again... One too many scary trips to the salon. :(

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  6. when i was in college i saved up a little extra money to pay for an extra-nice haircut at the salon that was rated best by our local alt weekly. i told the stylist i was trying to grow out my ear-length hair. she cut it in a way that left some of it the same length as when she started, and other bits (scattered around my head) about an inch long. it didn't even look particularly good.

    eventually i found somebody i trust to cut my hair. she decided to change careers, but thankfully she's okay with continuing to cut my hair in her kitchen. i thank my lucky stars for her every day.

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    1. Ugh, that's awful! Saving up for something special and having it botched like that is the worst. At least you have someone willing to beautify your hair even if it's in a kitchen!

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  7. From the photos: I like it :)

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    1. Thanks! I mean, I know it's not terrible, but it's totally not what I wanted either... :(

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  8. We were just having a discussion abot bad haircuts because one of my coworkers had hers screwed up this weekend. She had to have it fixed by her sister and she still is not happy with it. Bangs are way too short and they took off alot more than she asked for. I have had my share of bad haircuts and the last one was about a year before I met my boyfriend. So I had gone a full year without a haircut because of my trauma at the salon. We were talking about weekend plans and I told him I needed my hair cut and went on a rant about my disdain for going to the salon. Well he told me he could cut it for and explained how he could section it, trim what I wanted off and blend the uneven layers. Nevr had a guy offer to cut my hair for me before, but I thought what the heck, can't be any worse than the salon. So he got out his scissors (pro-grade hair shears, not kitchen scissors) put a towel around my shoulders and then combed out my hair, sectioned it, pinned up the top layers and trimmed 1 1/2" exactly as I had asked. He cleaned up the clippings and I dashed to the bathroom mirror to see the results. I combed it different ways and looked to see if there were any uneven ends, but it was a great haircut. I was so relieved, I mean I had just my boyfriend cu my hair. Was I crazy or something? What if he had screwed it up? But he didn't and I was so happy. I gave him a big hug and a lot of kisses, lol. Then I told him he was my new stylist. Yes, he still cuts my hair for me and I have not gotten a bad haircut since. I have saved hundreds on haircuts, my hair looks great and i do NOT miss the salon. A couple of women have told me that him cutting my hair is a control thing. I don't think so, I tell him when I want it trimmed and he does what I ask. I don't think I am being too controlling, and having my boyfriend do what I ask him to, certainly isn't controlling on his part. And I have finally been able to grow my hair out like I wanted to for years. No losing 6" when I want a 1/2" or less trim. I can wear braids and my hair is not falling in my face :)

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